Sunday, December 27, 2009

The band-aid

Exams - done. 6 terms out of 8 - done. Away from the madding world of numbers, analytical models, studies and assignments. Part of the way covered, a rather long way to go.. still. And it is the end of the year. Perfect time for some thought and an a-ha moment! And here it is - I call it - the band-aid concept.

Almost all of us certainly have some aspect or piece of life, that is, well, for lack of a better word - unsavory. More often than not, it is a piece of the past - an event, or an experience, something that really didn't leave too good a taste. Well, in short, almost every one of us has felt some pain in some form or another. Although all of us wish never to feel any sort of pain, no one is born invulnerable! I feel that it is this pain we feel that makes us human. Pasts can be painful, but they are painful because they were associated with something that at one time brought immense joy and the absence of that joy or the reference to that joy in past tense is now unfathomably painful.

But no one enjoys being in pain. And fretting and agonizing over it, never leads anyone anywhere. But so full of ourselves are we, that we believe that we are invulnerable, omnipotent and we take a kind of morbid pleasure in masochistic tendencies. We feel it is rather 'cool' for lack of a better word, to subject ourselves to trauma while outwardly appearing strong and capable of 'handling it'. And my response to this is - drop the act, quit the mask. It hurts and we all know it. Smiling through the pain, laughing in the rain, is good for poems and songs. It's not wrong to hinge on to something else and try to heal and then move on. I allude to the band-aid. It comes in as a panacea on the wound, and helps you heal.

But for how long can you hold on to an external support to heal the pain within? Sooner or later the band-aid's got to come off! And here, pulling off the band-aid, hurts more than the wound itself. It is much less the actual pain, than it is the psychological apprehension that something could hurt. It is the fear of the unknown - once hurt, one gets used to the band-aid and is afraid now of a new way of life, after the pain and without the band-aid. If a certain thing of the past has been covered, with the object of letting it heal itself, it is better to let the band-aid come off on its own. Forcefully prying it off, trying to prove to the world that you are strong and can handle and face anything with courage and might, is probably counterproductive. Some shards of the old wound might still be rather green and these could end up hurting and perhaps even festering!

Yes, everybody hurts, and everybody is entitled to a bolster in order to heal. Arrogance and feigning superiority, never helped anyone. But so what if something hurt? That is life, and this pain is what primes you for better joys ahead. So, step into the new year, knowing that every past is a promise for a bright new future that results in a resplendent new present. So like someone said - the past is gone, the future is unknown, all we have is the gift of the moment, which is why it is called - the present... Happy new year every one!

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