My two-wheeler diaries - week 1

Long years ago Che Guevarra embarked upon a journey to rediscover himself. And also to learn more about his own land - Latin America. From this year long journey sprang the Motorcycle Diaries'. I am sure most of us are acquainted with the book or the movie. But for the uninitiated, it is a chronicle of Earnesto Guevarra's travails through Latin America on a motorbike which first began as an exercise to practise medicine and ended up instilling a sense of revulsion towards the way life was for those in LatAm. So much so that he ended up becoming the world famous revolutionary, feted by communists and youngsters all over the world to date.

Now my chronicles are not so heroic. I cannot practise medicine (thankfully, did I hear you say?). But the likeness between Che's travels and mine, kinda hit me. Let's face it. If I began the post with 'On a hot sunny afternoon, we visited...' I'd have lost a reader! Rather, here, by opening with Che, I can be assured that you'll read this! Besides, Che went to practise medicine, and I am on a journey to rediscover healthcare in India. Che rode a motorbike. I rode on one!

So, my two-wheeler diaries are a thoroughbred CITYzen's look at an India on the roads. And I must say, Mumbai is definitely not India. And Ahmedabad definitely is not India. But for all practical purposes, Mumbai is an exception to the rule. Again, just like a very wise individual a year ago remarked to me that he used to ensure he got out of ISB every once in a while, just to get in touch with reality, since ISB was not Hyderabad, and certainly not reality, for me, a stint outside Mumbai opens up an all new India! Ahmedabad has an ethos about itself and a life of its own. A tier II city, nonetheless, but for me, any place not containing the hustle and bustle of Maximum City warrants an awestruck look!

So week one - keeping work related discussions aside - I noticed that the number of cows and bulls on the roads of AMD far outnumber the pedestrians! And when you travel pillion with someone, the sight of a bovine crossing is enough to make you freeze in terror. More so, what if the creatures look at you and you realize that you're wearing a red kurta! Furthermore, what if the creature has exquisite horns, much like the bisons of South Africa? Imagine you zooming across on a motor bike behind a big bus. You try to overtake the bus (don't say d-uh. All two-wheeler drivers here overtake buses. I wouldn't dream of overtaking a bus while sitting in the secured confines of a four-wheeler back in Mumbai, but nonetheless), and you shoot through their left or their right (thank God not the top, Chiranjeevi style). And moooooooooooooooo stands a bunch of bovine creatures! Screeeeech the bike goes. Mooooo the animal goes. Jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeez my head screams. One animal is still ok, but more often than not, happy family get togethers happen on the middle of C G road, or Ashram Road or any and every other arterial road! Whew! Or rather Mhoooo!

Second. When you are a pillion rider, you have a knight in shining armor right with you! Yes, on your head, your protector, gleaming in the sun, glistening in the rains, the visor protects your face in the rain and prevents you from looking like a Chinki, if you were ever photographed riding pillion, squinting in the rain. And each time the bike swerves, the knight calms you, saying hushhhh, it's ok. When a bus makes a precarious turn at a crossing, just as the bike zips ahead, and you almost think that this is it. You feel that the bus will certainly at least knock your knee and you'll be on the ground, and the knight says, 'don't worry, I'll protect your squash even if you come under the bus. Max damage will be restricted to the breakage of 205 bones, since the skull will be left intact.' Thank Knight for small mercies...

So much for week 1. Next time - true blue insights. And my take on what I saw as an India apart from Mumbai.

Football and the European Crisis

Once upon a time, there was a colony of ants that was slogging it out on a hot sunny afternoon collecting and stocking up on food. While the ants were toiling thus, a grasshopper who was making merry and singing away to glory. The grasshopper ridiculed the ants and their toils in the hot boiling sun, while the ants just kept about their job. In a few months, winter set in. The ants were happy eating the stocked food, in the warmth of their ant hills. Suddenly there was a knock on their door, and the grasshopper was outside, asking for some food. The ants replied, "You sang all summer and didn't show foresight. You made fun of our work, so now spend winter dancing."

A fiercely capitalist ideology would perhaps hold on to this notion of pure meritocracy. Indeed the whole concept of 'too big to fail', that has been dealt with at length in several news articles over the past couple of years and also mentioned several times right here on the lilac avenue is criticized by economists. They are of the view that this whole backing of large corporations by the government or bailing them out of bankruptcy is in a way condoning their faults and gross mismanagement. And that gives a signal to industry that once you bloat up in size, it's your way or the highway.

So when Greece teetered on the brink of collapse, and several Eurozone nations looked rather precarious, (they were called the PIGS - Portugal, Italy, Greece, Spain), people started worrying about the Euro. They looked towards Germany that has been steamrolling its way towards becoming a strong force to reckon with. Their laws are robust. Their industry is solid. Other statistics are strong as well. Indeed, having paid reparations through 2 World Wars, battling hyperinflation and having almost a generation of people wiped out thanks to the wars, taught them the fine art of fiscal balance and thrift. So they didn't go about borrowing and spending their way to progress. They were the ants in this story!

The PIGS were the grasshopper. Greece is rumored to have debts = 150% of their GDP. Thrift or spendthrift? And so, when all hell began to break loose, and people started looking at the country, they realized that this bubble needed to burst. Having burnt their fingers once through the sub-prime balloon that looked bright and yellow for a while, before a ghastly blast, people realized that the kind of social security measures, the benefits, the lax labor laws, all were pointing towards economies that were living way beyond their means. So they dropped Greece as if their hands were smeared with grease! And pretty soon, IGS followed.

The world worried whether Germany, whose progress looked like it was in a way not being allowed to reach it's full potential thanks to being bogged down by the Euro, might want to break away and restart with the Deutsche Mark. It looked like a very tantalizing proposition. Indeed there were discussions happening to that effect! But then, here being fiercely capitalist and meritocratic may not really be the right option. A corporation is one model and a country is yet another. A corporation can fail, and cause temporary pain to some people, maybe even an industry, resulting in long term gains achieved through improved legislation and measures. But if a country like Greece failed, or rather was allowed to fail by Germany, Germany would have faced dire consequences. Germany's growth is to a large extent dependent on exports, especially to other European countries. So, if one of those countries failed, Germany would lose a large chunk of her GDP! So in a way, condoning the past follies of these countries and propping them up, seems like the best option for the greater good of European humanity.

That said, in a way Spain winning the FIFA World Cup is good news. No doubt Casillas and Co are a happy lot, having won Spain's maiden World Cup. The mood in Spain is upbeat too. Rafa won the French Open and Wimbledon after a one year hiatus. And now Spain has the World Cup. So people would be happy. Happy people perhaps would spend, and boost confidence in their economies and that might just be the point where the European economy turned the corner towards the good! Weird thought, but worth the cogitation, right?

9th July 2010 - Another unique birthday memory

Oh yeah! It's that time of the year again. Once you cross a certain age, every added year looks like a millennium. All of a sudden, ankles, knees and everything begin to act up. And you realize - it's your birthday. But then, you have the life you've built around yourself over past years that ends up making your day go beyond just those creaking joints. It's all about being remembered by different people, who've had or who have some stake in your life, who in many cases, have perhaps not been in assiduous touch with you, but still remember and make the day special for you.

As usual, it was my favorite cousin who started it off. Her agenda was not to just wish me, but rather to ensure that she disrupted my sleep and that I was awake thanks to her! And then it was the ever dependable friend of mine from the Eastern part of the world, who had the privilege to wake up a few hours ahead of us Indians. But unlike me, who woke him up in the middle of the night at 3 am, just because it was still his birthday in my part of the world, this guy decided to just message me and prevent getting expletives from a sleepy me!

And then for the second time in a row, here I was bringing in my birthday at a new place of work, where no one knew that today was the day I graced the earth so many years ago. I kinda liked the incognito method of operation, because I feel that there are perhaps some things better left to zero publicity. And leaving some things out of Facebook perhaps holds on to some of the fun of anticipation! So, my oldest friend all the way from school, my closest friends from my first work place, some from undergrad, some others from various other walks of life all added that zing to my day. And the best part was being remembered and wished by my very first boss at work, and my very first super-boss as well, who've consistently remembered through all these years. And even better was the fact that my dear ex super boss promised me an i-pad. (Yup, now the promise is set in stone hehehehhe..:D :D)

So two rounds of cell phone charging later, I thought that my one year hiatus from Mumbai had not in any way diminished the spirit of kinship between me and my pals and felt very good about it all, as the day drew to a close. The weekend dawned and I decided to go visit my very first friends in the corporate world, at a place that still gladdens my heart with each visit. Little did I know what was awaiting me. All said and done, it has been 2 years since I stopped working in that place, but my closest friends there, my ex-boss included, decided to throw me a surprise fare, with my favorite black forest cake, and all my friends incidentally showing up at the pre-decided cubicle! And the cake cutting was in a typical ceremonial fashion, just like old times, and all my protests against having white cream smeared on my face fell on deaf ears. It just didn't end there, but rather a date with Tom Cruise followed.

Knight and Day - well - a cross between Mission Impossible and Jerry Maguire. But, ever since Top Gun, TC is a treat on any day, especially after sooooo long. The wrinkles have begun to show, but the smile still is as infectious as ever! The story was feeble, and like Teeps said, the movie should rather have been called 'battery', although when the titles began to roll, RB wondered whatever happened to the central character - the battery! But then again, a mindless movie starring a couple of lookers is the perfect definition of a weekend, especially this weekend!

The titles have rolled, the taste of black forest cake still lingers in my mouth. Yet again, a bunch of my friends have added another new memory to the event called my birthday. Thanks a lot guys, I really feel special!

Eyjafjallajo...KULL THE CONQUEROR!!!

On Saturday, this was a tiny snippet in BBC and a tiny one liner in the papers. That such a blink-and-you'll-miss-it piece of news could bring 27000 flights a day to a grinding halt, cripple an already debilitated airline industry, strand passengers all over the globe, give the jitters to anyone traveling towards that part of the world, was unimaginable to say the least!

The other day, I was telling a friend about this volcano that has erupted in Iceland. I typed out the name to her - Eyjafjallajokull. Her response was - 'Please turn the webcam towards the kid who's playing with your keyboard!' Yup. No one knew about this poor volcano till date. I never knew volcanoes existed under the ice in a country called ICELAND! But now I know. And I know so very well, that I could never forget it even if I so wished! So, ***** Kull the conqueror, as I'd rather call it, has managed to throw a whole world into disarray. Several things are coming to the fore thanks to this volcano.

One - Europe is still the center of the world. The other day, I was stuck at a level crossing in Mumbai. I was on the road and the gates were lowered to signal the arrival of a train. To get to my destination, I had to cross those railway tracks and move on. While I waited, anxiously looking at the watch, knowing I was running 20 minutes late, I kept looking at the tracks. Almost 7 trains went past in quick succession. And I wondered - Had I not been standing here, I never would have realized the fact that so many trains ply on that line! Likewise, it takes a volcano to realize that 27,000 flights ply the European airspace per day! Even though Africa is not too far away from Europe, it is almost unimaginable to think of Dubai airport supplanting Heathrow, let alone Entebbe or the airport of Cote d'Ivoire!

Second, a non-third world passport is a boon in such a case. I saw a small report on BBC today, where a correspondent on holiday somewhere in Europe. Hearing about the volcano, he tried to go via road back to London. Not being able to rent a car there, he crossed the border to the neighboring country and hired a car there and drove down to Barcelona, from whence he spoke to BBC! I can only imagine what would happen to someone holding an Indian passport being stuck in Heathrow. I guess the maximum that can happen would be that the BA guys, out of goodwill could let the passengers to go on a transit visa to an airport hotel. Maybe some may not be given that advantage either! As an Australian friend remarked one day, his passport was of use in traveling, without a visa in Europe, North America and a greater part of LatAm, since it was a valid ID. His Indian wife's passport on the other hand, was of precious little use. So, any Europe - wide travel plans he may have had were pitifully scuttled by the prospect of having to stand in never-ending queues for his wife's visas!!!

So Kull has taught us a lot. And now that the lessons are over, I sincerely wish Kull cools down and let's the planes fly.

Of Yanni, Enya, Chopin and all things beautiful

Imagine a typical day. Yards and miles of walking. Balmy mornings turning into sultry afternoons. A whole bunch of errands to complete, the sun setting, with you trudging along grimy and tired yet staring at a list of unfinished tasks.

If this doesn't make you all low, I wonder what will. For this certainly puts me all sad, needing some cheering up.

Well Yanni and Enya happen to be my 'cheer-up' people. I am sure all of us have our own ways of pulling ourselves out of the blues. My method is to binge on some Yanni or Enya. Not that they are meant only for the low and blue times, but they generally perk up my spirits whenever I listen to them. And today I sat wondering why they manage to perk me up. Apart from the melodies, I guess an underlying reason is the fact that several songs are associated with sweet memories and listening to the song evokes those memories again.

For instance, I remember a birthday when I was busy wrapping up some work in the dead of the night. There was gentle rain outside and Yanni was playing 'Playing by Heart'. Suddenly around 12 .30 am, a friend called up. It was around 3 am his time, and he'd called up to wish me happy birthday! I found it very very sweet that the chap stayed up all night just to call! And then the day panned out beautifully with some other friends making my day special in their own way. The memories may be dear, but the undercurrent all day long, was Yanni and Playing by Heart.

His 'After the Sunrise' was the song playing in my ears when we finally reached the summit of a mountain I'd climbed and the mellow orange hues we saw then are what come to my mind when I hear that song.

The reason I like Yanni though is for his melodies. You perhaps can't find deep classical insights in his music. But you sure can find a beautiful confluence of different instruments and a lovely tune. Take 'Marching Season' for instance. The beauty lies in the way the song is gentle with plain simple piano notes in the beginning till a crescendo after which almost effortlessly the song meanders into a beat. Likewise in the case of "Nostalgia'. The shamisen like notes in 'Nightingale' give a very oriental feel to the song and almost immediately they bring in my mind images of kimono-clad women against cherry blossoms in Japan! So Yanni's music is really vivid in all respects.

Chopin in contrast is fiercely classical. His Mazurka in F minor is a masterpiece. But it is more like the 'Raagam' that people sing in Carnatic music. Those in the know would know that in Raagam, people take one line of a song and explore the various nuances of a Raag. Likewise, Chopin in Mazurka for instance, takes a single tune and attaches several different nuances that lead to that tune. So, clearly, he does not have several different hummable melodies if I may say so, but rather they make for very mellow listening that doesn't interfere with any cognitive work you may be involved in - You can't be distracted and be led into humming the tune, you see. They're much too difficult to remember and hum!

Then comes Enya. Her music is a lovely confluence of classical tunes, melodies, instruments and also some lovely lyrics every now and then. Take 'The First of Autumn' for instance. You actually have a Cello there, and this leads to a female choir. The beauty in this song is, that I can actually imagine a scene of sorts and play this tune as a background score! Take 'One by One'. This has lovely lyrics - a tad sad, but hopeful, as does 'Only time'. Again, 'The Memory of trees' has a very 'woodsy' feel to it. You can picture walking through glades in forests, surrounded by green hues all around.

And that was when I realized that my love for all these kinds of music springs less from explicit imagery in the song and more from the kinds of imaginative pictures and thoughts this kind of music can evoke. And another thing I realized is that such music also falls under the category of being an acquired taste - much like wine. So try as I might, I realized that it may be impossible to push my tastes down someone else's throat, since it is almost impossible to impose one's imagination and thought images into someone else!

So while the world can groove to their pet passions, for me it will still be the Marching Season, Playing By Heart, Nightingale, A Love for a Life or Book of Days, The First of Autumn, The Memory of Trees and Only Time...

Mumbai and the Mumbaikar - as viewed by everyone else

So.. the last goodbyes were said after exchanging promises of staying in touch. And today, life begins again in Maximum City. And after having spent a whole year outside, I had to put in something on how others perceive Mumbai and its inhabitants - the Mumbaikars. But first, 2 lines on my immediate reactions. I came in at around 2 am last night, and as has perhaps been written right here in the past, the city was as vibrant as ever. The people at the airport, totally friendly, cabbies, security guards, everyone. And no matter what anyone may say, humid or otherwise, 29 degrees is on any day better than scorching 45 degrees!!!

Now, outside Mumbai, and within India, Mumbai evokes totally contrasting reactions. One of awe, like, admiration and aspiration and another of being intimidated, disgusted and overwhelmed. And the former reactions do not emanate from a Mumbaikar, but rather both these sets of reactions come from people who have lived a while in Mumbai.

So some, who like a city for its people, find Mumbai immensely friendly. And this I can vouch for myself. People here are friendly. Now, you can't expect Japanese style cordiality or congeniality, but people won't snap at you, or cabbies won't insult you if you ask them to change a route midway. You can count on the person standing next to you to help you with a heavy bag, perhaps even without your asking for assistance if you are female. And as a city, it is very very safe for women, since well, people are much too busy running behind their own lives to actually think lecherously about a woman on the street! And so, some people who like to be left to live their life and make it the way they want to enjoy the city for its 'bindaas' nature. They enjoy the pace, the continuous run to be at the top of your game, and the positive attitude of people towards work and merit.

And then there is the other category, who hate Mumbai. All they see are the slums, the congested roads, the traffic snarls, the crowds and so on. They perhaps hail from smaller or more laid back cities and literally get intimidated by the pace and stress on meritocracy in Mumbai. They yearn for the idyllic lifestyle back in their old cities/towns and detest every waking moment in Maximum City, maybe because this stress on Maximum and extremes is a bit tough to handle! And I must admit. Mumbai is unforgiving in pushing her inhabitants to the extreme. Be it the rents or having to endure the crowds in public transport. Then again, some who come here to follow a dream and believe in the dream real bad, stick it through and once the teething troubles are endured, there comes a point of inflexion, post which they are initiated into the land of the Mumbaiphile, whence there is no return to falling in love with another Indian city.

And the former group perceives Mumbaikars as being bindaas, chilled out, fun-loving people, who bear malice towards none. The latter group, though looks at Mumbaikars as being arrogant, headstrong, non-adjusting and to some extent even conceited. I may be wrong in my assessment, but this is a glaring trend that I have perceived in my interactions. Now should a Mumbaikar be perturbed by these perceptions? I guess, given that we are carefree and bindaas, as what we'd like to be known as, the latter perception should perhaps be read in the light of the prejudices of the perceivers themselves and so can maybe be disregarded, after due consideration has been given to the veracity of these perceptions. Are we by any chance too carefree to be perceived as being arrogant? Are we too focused to be perceived as being selfish? Maybe just a reflective thought by the sea side every once in a while, but not before smelling the sweet salty air of the Arabian Sea.

For all other practical purposes - for all Mumbaikars, irrespective of what they may be perceived to be, Mumbai was, is and perhaps will always be their true love...

Invictus and Forgiveness

I happened to watch the movie Invictus the other day. It was a great movie indeed. Well, not only did it have amazing performances by Matt Damon and Morgan Freeman, but it also conveyed a lot about forgiveness. And as usual, it got me thinking. I know, I can hear you say, 'temme something new'.

There were two specific instances that caught my attention. One, when the rugby team which comprises almost only whites, except for one Native African is expected to sing the newly formed South African national anthem, which is not in Afrikaans - their usual language. And the second was when Matt Damon, the rugby team's skipper (or cappie as he's called) visits Mandela's cell in Robben Island and is appalled at the tiny living enclosure. Both these instances struck me for their ideas on forgiveness.

The Native Africans had been severely oppressed by Apartheid. And then after the struggle, they were suddenly to be treated as equals. They had been severely wronged, and in no less words, deserved an apology in kind, forever. A simple beginning was just the whites relinquishing their old Afrikaans anthem and embracing the new anthem that combined stanzas in Xhosa, Zulu, Sesotho, Afrikaans and English. This many found tough to do, but interestingly, in the movie, which is supposedly based on real life events, the rugby team doesn't just mouth the words, they sing along in the World Cup! And this in effect gave the whites a chance to be the 'bigger person'. Why? Because they needed to swallow their pride, realize their folly and take steps to make amends.

Now consider the second event - Mandela was locked up in a tiny cell on Robben Island for 27 years. Matt Damon's character remarks on the evening before the final match, that he was pensive not about the match but about how one person, who was locked up in such a tiny cell, could come out and forgive those that put him there. Here, we see another aspect of forgiveness. When a person is wronged, by another and the other person comes to apologize, the wronged person has two options. One - make a big deal out of it, and make the wrong-doer feel even more small. Or graciously accept the apology, forgive and move on. And as it turns out, the latter option actually is more deserving of respect!

So in a way, in any situation, both people have a chance to prove character. The wrongdoer can step up and show that she is ready to accept her follies and apologize and make amends. A wronged person can be the 'bigger person' by simply forgiving and letting go, by proving to the transgressor that she values the relationship more than any small incident. The tradeoff though is giving up on those few seconds of garnering importance from the wrongdoer and having the wrongdoer desperately seek you out, give you importance and try to make amends. At the end of the day, it is up to each person to decide what to do. It is a tough choice to make, but the choice has to be made!

And this need not be the case only in huge communal or racial tiffs. Take a simple story - One person (Anna) has hurt another (Beth) through some action or word. The aftermath has 2 options - One, Anna comes up and of her own apologizes, or two, Beth confronts her on the same. In the latter case, it is very easy to analyze the psychological underpinnings, and say that Anna acted the way she did because of whatever reason and so, the onus is on her to ensure that the relationship is repaired. In fact, Beth would come and confront Anna with the case, if and only if she felt that their relationship was strong enough to warrant a confrontation. Usually in very strong relationships, a confrontation does indeed happen wherein Beth tells Anna why she is hurt and Anna then has to make it up.

Now take case 1, which is a bit more complex. It depends here on how much one values the other. Maybe Anna values the relationship a lot and so wants to put to rest any possible cogitations that may be bothering Beth. So she goes ahead and clears the situation. Now Beth has two options again. One, she can be the bigger person and make Anna feel comfortable, and let the issue go. Or two, Beth can perhaps act up, and make a big issue out of the whole thing, and prove her ascendancy over Anna, and make her feel small and abashed.

Now, my take is, that Anna shows character by stepping up and clearing up the situation, and Beth shows more character by letting the issue go, but not after sufficient communication. The time when Beth acts up and tries to put down Anna, is where the whole situation gets a bit dicey, since it looks like an attempt to prove an already proven point and trying to push an already pushed down person further into the earth. And this many-a-time, doesn't help Beth's image in Anna's eyes. Perhaps Anna expects a good friend to want to make her comfortable, despite the transgression and expects some 'bigger person' behavior from Beth.

So everywhere, everyone has a choice to prove character. It is up to the person always whether she wants to accept the opportunity or let it go in favor of 15 seconds of fame!

Love thy fellow humans - Not really...

It was 4:58 in the morning. I was outside the gates of the airport. Sleepy eyed, bored, bugged with a traffic jam in the early morning at the airport check post, yet forced to wait there grumpily looking at the cop who wanted to verify whether I was indeed who I claimed to be. And then I walked in, went towards the airline counter. I presented my ticket and I thought that maybe the airline staff had been trained to smile and so they would, but they played mirror mirror - I looked grumpy, they looked grumpier!

And then the lady said, " check in is 30 minutes before take off. Sorry." Exasperated, I look at my watch. 5.03, it says. Take off was at 5:30.

"But I am 3 minutes late! And that was because the cop outside was building a caricature of mine in his head, while verifying my identity. And his friends further out were allowing cars to go in a trickle and somewhere in the middle someone decided to stop the car in the middle of the road and say her poignant goodbyes."

"Sorry ma'am. Pick up your new ticket outside, our flight is tomorrow at the same time. Oh and don't forget to pay the fare difference", she said and bluntly walked off.

3 minutes is mean. No airline's flight takes off on the dot, and definitely not those of the airline I am talking about. Then how could they enforce strict time lines on me, when they don't live their own word? Ok, there is no written script that says that a plane must take off at the designated time, but there is a written script that check in closes 30 minutes prior to departure. OK fine, at least some empathy? Poor soul coming in in the dead of the night! But no way. Have chance to prove ascendancy - will do so.

The other day, I was at a Govt. office. I needed a small clarification and this gentleman behind the counter was counting notes. Yup, counting currency notes and not just one bundle, but rather a whole pile - presumably settling the day's transactions. And I had a query about where to sign! My task 2 minutes, counting notes - God knows! But no. I asked, and he put up his hand - wait. I waited. He moved to bundle number 2. I asked again. He signaled - wait. I waited. And this went on for 15 minutes after which he looked up and said, " Oh that, go and ask at counter number 1." Empathy again. Someone is waiting, and her time is perhaps as important as yours. But no. Have chance to prove ascendancy - will do so.

It gets quite frustrating, when you know that someone would have to make a very small concession for you to book a huge gain! Waive off 3 minutes, so you can make a flight. Just listen for a second, so you can get your job done. Apply a bit of my point of view to a situation and accommodate my wish, at no cost to you! But when people are in positions of less power, I feel, that they do not wish to squander any chance to let you know that they can exert the force of their will on your plans! And that does not feel good. Irritation, exasperation, desperation, generalization verily follow - 'Man, why can't she let me check in?' 'Just tell me where I need to sign, and I can get on with my life!' ' Pleeeease... I have to be on that plane, and it is just 3 minutes.' 'Man, these government people are lazy' - are standard responses!

Can we do anything about this? I guess yes, next time we're in a position of 'power', let's look from the other person's perspective before saying a blatant NO.

My pearls of whatever

I've been writing this post since quite a while. I wanted to try and collate as many of my random thoughts as I possibly could before putting them here. So some of you may find this post absolutely profound, and some of you may find the stuff here absolutely inane. But you know what? Profound or inane, doesn't matter. You're here, you might as well read the stuff here :)

So here are my pearls of wisdom/ insanity/ whatever. I use the first person, since it is easiest to convey and ruffles the least of feathers. Simple.

1. I kept chasing that which was never mine to be, under the delusion of having found perfection. Only to realize that in my chase for perfection, I was leaving behind the imperfect appropriateness which is what life is all about.
2. I kept laughing with them all along, to try and break out of the mould, only to realize at the end that the joke was on me all along.
3. If the sub-conscious mind is indeed so strong, why don't all dreams come true?
4. I kept thinking up camouflaging reasons for my choices, without realizing that my decisions were my own whose rationale did not need explaining to anyone but a few. And those few never questioned the rationale.
5. People say and do things that hurt you. And you feel hurt because you're sensitive. And many-a-time, you wish you could hurt them back. Unfortunately those who get hurt, seldom ever have the insensitivity that's needed to hurt others.
6. Every move was made in an attempt to try to be accepted into the social code of conduct, to try and make everyone like me as a person. Little did I then realize that those who wish to dislike me would do so, everything else notwithstanding, and trying to win them over would only be a gross waste of time.
7. Humanity is a weird species. You are always judged for WHAT you are, rather than for WHO you are.
8. Contrary to what anyone may say, you are what you are perceived to be. If you don't like what people think of you, change what you portray of yourself.
9. The hunt for perfection is a hunt for dejection. There is never such a thing as a perfect friendship, a perfect relationship, a perfect life. Perfection is an illusion, and like a mirage that deludes the thirsty into imagining the presence of water, perfection deludes an individual into an assumed land of success and acceptance, till finally the mirage collapses and the perfectionist is left in the middle of the scorching desert, burnt, bruised and battered and left to fend for himself while everyone around him has left him on account of his nitpicking ways.
10. Providential dispensation is honestly weird. Seemingly run-of-the-mill individuals get everything that defines the whole, complete life, while exceptionals essentially end up as outliers - with neither the entities that define the normal life, not the embellishments that define the good life.

To be or what to be

People keep saying that you need to be different. Stand out from the crowd. Everyone is special and different. Follow your dreams to make your mark in the world. And so on and so forth. And all through life, we go on, believing that we are indeed the next best thing after penicillin. Well, elders would say, no harm in igniting a fire within the generation to go ahead and achieve their goals. And I agree. No harm done in letting us go on with stars in our eyes. Harm is done only when these stars end up becoming shooting stars! Red giant to a white dwarf indeed!

So what is the whole deal about having to be different? Standing out from the crowd that everyone touts all the time. Does it make sense? Well, diversity can perhaps take one to Harvard - like in the movie Legally Blonde maybe. But in life, this diversity comes to sting one back. You are so different from the typical mould, that others don't know where to fit you! And from being a model prototype, you become the outcast, the atypical! And that definitely hurts.

But take the other view. People can't cast you into any of their pre-decided moulds. They expect you to change. Change who you are, how you act, who you deal with, change everything. Project what you are in a way that appeals to others, in a way that others want to see you. That hurts all the more. Why? Because you are in a way shedding what you are, and you are turning into something you have no clue about. And in all probability, you will end up being neither yourself, nor what others want you to be, but rather a weird half-baked concoction that dangles somewhere in between. And that is certainly not very nice.

But what is wrong in being yourself? Why adhere to peer-created mores? Why be politically correct and refrain from calling a spade a spade? The answer is simple. No man is an island. You are what you are perceived to be. And you will be perceived only if others like what they perceive. I know, it is a bit circular in reasoning, but think about it. If being me is so contrary to what others perceive, then it's a sign that what I am is perhaps not as liked by others. And individuality to the extent of being loathed is definitely not what even the most individualistic, self-willed person would want.

So, till society exists, duplicity in all its forms, will perhaps persist. Perhaps that is why behavior is a science, complete with hypotheses, findings, conclusions and underlying principles.

I feel bad for...

A few of my favorite things would probably align a lot with raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens. So here is a list of things I won't say I don't like, but rather things I feel bad for. To a large extent, I guess my list will have bits and pieces from each of your lists as well. So here goes.

1. I feel bad for the ignorant. Now, people may say that ignorance is bliss. But I guess people who don't know, lose out on the pleasures of knowing. For example, people who associate the color red with just a Coke salesperson, for lack of knowledge of anything like a Ferrari, or Manchester United or Michael Schumacher - well, I feel bad that their gamut of knowledge is quite contrived, and they lose out on phenomena like Man U in Old Trafford or Tifosi.


2. I feel bad for those who are idea maniacs. Well, their genius as regards coming up with ideas is phenomenal. But many a time, they take the stance of the trigger happy shooter. If you come up with something, they are the first to shoot it down. 'So what is the alternative?', you ask. 'I don't know, but certainly not what you churned out', comes the reply. Why feel bad for them? I guess because they sure will find it hard when they meet another of their species!


3. I feel bad for those who borrow things and lose them. And I'm sure you've had cases through school and college, where someone in a hurry borrows your pen and your favorite Cross is what you have on you. You lend it with a high degree of reluctance and wait and watch for the person to return it, when suddenly he says, "Oops! I guess I left it at the counter. Sorry", and walks off. Similar is the case of the person who borrows your favorite book and returns a book with dog-eared mangled pages. Why feel bad for them? Well, simply because of their gross lack of sensitivity and because of their callousness towards dealing with others.


4. I feel bad for the egoistic, successful person. One who believes he/she is invincible, just because he/she has achieved the elements of his/her task list. Why? Simply because they are dealt the highest level of hypocrisy. Everyone around them basks in their glory, desperately wants to be associated with them, acts as if they are the person's true friends. But in reality, all these emotions manifest themselves up until the time that the emotion can bring about a worthy use.


5. And last, but not the least, I feel bad for one who puts up with the above types of people, without raising so much as a finger of protest when any of their actions wrong them. Why? Because they are just too simple for this dog-eat-dog world, and they sincerely need to go on a treasure hunt to find their lost self esteem.

That's it. It is indeed a small list, unlike my lists of random thoughts, or Whys. Thank God for that, since a longer list may have meant more ruffled feathers! This post may have been a bit rough and acerbic. But these are just thoughts. Think about it, and you may realize that you run a similar list as well.

Success and Excess - II

Somehow success and excess always seem to go hand in hand. A while ago when the China - Arunachal Pradesh conflict was at its peak, the visa issue, the rock painting fiasco and so on, elicited 'Power, Politics, Success and Excess'. A talk about ethics and transgressions and how you always have a choice came out in 'How much is too much'. And today, again, on the topic of where to draw a line, here are some thoughts.

One of my professors mentioned a very interesting trend in hedge funds . He said, "Some firms are engineered to blow up." He spoke of LTCM and Bear Stearns' 2 funds that were forced to fold. LTCM failed in a macro sense because of a black swan that no one expected. No one dreamt that Russia, America's cold war nemesis and erstwhile feared superpower would default! But one can always argue against such exigencies and ask why risk management practices weren't more robust to prevent even the rarest of rare events from causing damage. Then when we speak of Bear Stearns that broke because of massive exposure to subprime lending and the subsequent drying up of credit markets, one asks again, isn't it a manifestation of excesses? Why didn't people stem the exposure long before the situation went beyond salvage? Take GM. Why do entities need to blow up to 'bailout size' and then justify bailouts saying that they are too big to fail?

Take hedge funds again. We came to know that John Merriweather of LTCM, recently floated his third or fourth fund after busting subsequent funds! Who would have lent him money, you ask? Well, every fund makes some money for some (to the tune of several millions) and loses money for some others. Those who make money, do so thanks to discerningly or luckily removing their money from the fund at the right time and they will lend to these fund managers in their new escapedes, despite the previous fund's having folded! They get the guts to lend again, thanks to the confidence built by having several million dollars of disposable income! The poor, loyal, unsuspecting bunch end up on the left tail of the bell curve, and these are the scapegoats who bear the brunt of irrational exuberance displayed in excesses by successful managers, or they are unfortunate souls who think that their pot of gold just needs an ounce more ! And these people, well, many-a-time, aren't able to reach even 50% of their starting baseline level of affluence! And the story goes on and on.

So more often than not, success leads to excess and this excess can catapult some to untouched heights, while thrusting some others into the chasms of lonely failures. So is regulation the key? Now apparently there are thoughts of regulating some hedge funds by a central authority. Being a strong proponent of efficient markets and classical economic theory, all I can say is - entities that have thrived through self regulation are better off being left alone. Humans never interfere in the laws of the jungle, but somehow, a justice system exists and functions (more efficiently) in the wilderness. So we are better off observing the beauty of self-regulation, Darwinian theory of selection, machinations of the wheels of fortune and the extremes of successes and excesses playing out in front of our eyes, rather than pillage the same with concrete barriers that can destroy this beauty.

Such are the ways of the world. Every black has a white, every God has a satan, every right has a wrong and every winner has a loser.

Another snippet of wisdom

A friend sent this to me a while ago, and as is the usual practice, what I want to hold on to over time, I put up on my blog. So in continuation with 'My tryst with Ithaca', 'Where has the time gone?', and 'A life so frivolous', here is the other snippet of wisdom. (Do open the above links in a new window). The theme is constant - don't run behind something frivolous. Life is bigger, better and at the end of the running, you might reach a goalpost looking at which you wonder why you ran all this distance in the first place.

A boat docked in a tiny Goan village. A tourist from Mumbai complimented the Goan fisherman on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took him to catch them.

'Not very long,' answered the fisherman.
'But then, why didn't you stay out longer and catch more?' asked the Mumbaite.

The Goan fisherman explained that his small catch was sufficient to meet his needs and those of his family.

The Mumbaite asked, 'But what do you do with the rest of your time?'

'I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, and take a siesta with my wife. In the evenings, I go into the village to see my friends, play guitar, sing a few songs... I have a full life.'

The Mumbaite interrupted, 'I have an MBA from IIM-A, and I can help you! You should start by fishing longer every day. You can then sell the extra fish you catch. With the extra revenue, you can buy a bigger boat.'

'And after that?' asked the Goan.

'With the extra money the larger boat will bring, you can buy a second one and a third one and so on until you have an entire fleet of trawlers. Instead of selling your fish to a middle man, you can then negotiate directly with the processing plants and maybe even open your own plant. You can then leave this little village and move to Panjim, or even Mumbai. From there you can direct your huge new enterprise.'

'How long would that take?' asked the Goan.

'Twenty, perhaps twenty-five years,' replied the Mumbaite.

'And after that?'
'Afterwards? Well my Friend, That's when it gets really interesting,' chuckled the Mumbaite, 'When your business gets really big, you can start selling stocks and make millions!'

'Millions? Really? And after that?' asked the Goan.
'After that you'll be able to retire, live in a tiny village near the coast, sleep late, play with your children, catch a few fish, take a siesta with your wife and spend your evenings doing what you like with your buddies.'

'With all due respect sir, but that's exactly what I am doing now. So what's the point wasting 25 years?' asked the Goan.

And the moral of the story is? Know where you're going in life. You may already be there. And if you're elsewhere, aspiring to be somewhere else, find out where you really want to be

In anticipation

Anticipation - is a feeling beyond just one associated with waiting for something. What the emotions associated with anticipation are, is dependent on what you're waiting in anticipation for.

According to me, there are 3 main categories of anticipation. One, where the outcome is definitely positive. Like maybe waiting 9 months for your child, or even the wait before a last exam! Over here, the anticipation feels good. You enjoy the wait, although you do wish the wait would end soon, so you can get to the part of enjoying the result of the wait. But the waiting never really hurts!

Then there is the anticipation of something bad. Like waiting for a coworker to come in to work, only for you to have to let him go thereafter. That wait hurts. One, you don't know whether the guy would react. Second, you don't know whether the guy would react like you expect him to! The outcome is decidedly painful, and the wait is even more painful. You desperately wish to get it over with and move on to the more painful part of living with yourself after the task is done!

And the third category of anticipation is the one that hurts the most. And this is the wait for the uncertain outcome! Like the wait for an exam score. Or the wait for the result of an interview. or the first phone call after a date. I could go on and on, the list is perhaps endless. But the wait, you wish never existed! This wait sends your heart on a flutter-spree - (wonder whether such a word even exists). This wait involves a lot of 'what-if' analysis. You dream and imagine - 'well, if I get this score, I can do this and that and that. If he calls me, maybe I should act this way. If I don't get that job, I am up the creek without a paddle. But throughout this painful wait, there is a strong glimmer of hope. You keep waiting, hoping strongly in your heart of hearts that maybe a positive outcome would result. You ask why is this the most painful? Well, because, if the outcome is negative, the wait and the hope all comes crashing down, and any crash hurts like hell!

So while waiting may be nice in some cases, I personally prefer a GMAT style life. Click your last answer and your score pops up in less than 1 minute. No damaged nails, no guzzled caffeine, no frantic phone calls, nothing. Just finish a task, get a result and KEEP MOVING IN LIFE! Life is much too short to waste waiting in anticipation. The electric bulb was never invented in a waiting room. If only various stake holders of our lives would realize that, then the collective productivity of humanity would go up almost a million times! So anticipating a life sans waits...

Bow down or bow out?

Today's post is a story.

There was once a country that had been colonized by certain powers-that-be. These powers-that-be felt glorified by their power to make the country bow to their wishes. The country was primarily agrarian and the harvests were typically very lucrative in open markets. And historically the colonizer had reaped profits from these harvests. Throughout the year, they'd send their representatives to come and check on the people, regularly, and try to teach them the right ways of farming. But to ensure that the people adhered to their code of conduct of genuflecting to them, they used brute force. Novel methods of forcing people were employed and out of fear, the country bowed low.

As time progressed, however, these powers-that-be were told that brute force was no longer in vogue and that subtlety was more respected, they backed off from their obtrusive, blatantly arm twisting tactics of exercising control to something more discrete. They decided to exercise control only in the harvesting season. by trying to build a pecking order story around themselves when it came to harvests. Yes, markets were free. Yes, farmers were allowed to sell their produce in open markets and the best produce got the best price, regardless of the buyer. All these rules applied in a weird twisted Henry Ford way (Remember - you get the choice of all colors as long as it is black?) So, the rule was that the colonizer would get right of way, at their prices and their whims on the produce. Once their granaries and coffers were full, the remaining produce could be sold off to the market, if any. All other market players were expected to wait for the colonizer to finish so that they could get their scrapings. And wait they did, for if they did not wait, they didn't get any produce. And yes, people knew that what the colonizer was doing was wrong and completely against normal economic theory. Those who did not agree to this plan - well, no one disagreed. Like I said, they bowed low, out of plain fear.

Over the years, they genuflected. When asked why, they said that the rains were undependable. It rained one year resulting in a bounty and was dry in the next, resulting in a failure. No open market would promise to buy produce when cyclical characteristics were so haphazard each year, and when uncertainties allowed no projections to ever be correct.

"But what about being cheated in years when you have a great crop and the market is willing to pay you more?", someone asked.

"Well, let's say that loss is the price we pay for security in down years", a farmer replied. "Besides, majority of the people here don't get wonderful crops. They get average harvests and average harvests typically get average prices in the open market. At least selling to the colonizer adds some snob value, if not anything else. So, people are very keen only to sell to the colonizer, and they bee-line up to the colonizer's granaries to offload their produce and get their money. So the country has decreed that we would sell to no one else but the colonizer and unless he gives us permission, we won't visit the open market. "

But one farmer (Mr X) was different. He consistently grew a good crop every year and felt himself stifled by the country's policies. He felt that arm twisting and pressure tactics served no one any good and that free markets by and far were the most efficient means to ensure profit for hard work. So, he decided one day, not to bow down to the colonizer. Everyone expected him to face the ire of the collection agents, with probable bloodshed. They sat glued to the TV watching what the news covered about the talks between this farmer and the colonizer. The dialogues went on for a while that seemed like eternity! The colonizer began to get agitated. They threatened to boycott the farmer forever. They threatened never to support him in case he had a crop failure. The farmer looked upon all of this calmly. And with a mild smile said, " Do your worst. I believe in myself and my skills. My losing you, would be your loss and not mine. But if you are so insecure about yourself, such that you need to frighten people to get your way, since you feel that other buyers in the open market will manage to get a better deal, I suggest, that you take a vacation and introspect on what you need to change about your image. Maybe you need a downward revision in your perception rating, and that would bring your true core and your perceived core on par. Maybe I am wrong, and you do have a stellar image on par with strong core values. Allow the farmers to then take a decision, based on what they value. As for me, rusticate me if you will, for I will, no matter what you do, go to the market."

So saying, he left the negotiation table, went to the open market with his produce and got double of what he had cumulatively received over all the past years. Feeling cheated, and knowing that X's precedent was on their side, several other farmers who had confidence in themselves ventured into the open market, despite threats from the colonizer. The trickle converted to a cascade as people realized the hollowness of the threats and the lack of core values in the colonizer. Eventually, prosperity prevailed and everybody lived happily ever after.

So, when forced to bow, everyone has a choice. Not everyone chooses not to bow, since they perhaps feel insecure about the unknown future, that could come about, if they did not bow. But as they say, fortune favors the brave and blaming country policies for genuflection, are unfounded claims! You always have a choice of whether to bow down or bow out.

10 more random thoughts

1. What hurts more? Having what you don't want or not having what you really want?
2. What hurts more? Not getting what you want or not getting what you think you want?
3. Why do things inconsequential in the distant future have severe repercussions on near future events?
4. Why is the greater part of humankind frightfully optimistic?
5. Everything is ephemeral, just the cycles of highs and lows are constant.
6. Some people never give up on you despite your giving up on yourself.
7. People are different, but their differentiating factors are all the same.
8. Risk and reward are positively correlated. But where stakes are high, effort and reward are almost always negatively correlated.
9. Your core skill almost always is of consequence only in the long run, with zero short term benefits.
10. Clairvoyance could be such a stress reliever!!

The band-aid

Exams - done. 6 terms out of 8 - done. Away from the madding world of numbers, analytical models, studies and assignments. Part of the way covered, a rather long way to go.. still. And it is the end of the year. Perfect time for some thought and an a-ha moment! And here it is - I call it - the band-aid concept.

Almost all of us certainly have some aspect or piece of life, that is, well, for lack of a better word - unsavory. More often than not, it is a piece of the past - an event, or an experience, something that really didn't leave too good a taste. Well, in short, almost every one of us has felt some pain in some form or another. Although all of us wish never to feel any sort of pain, no one is born invulnerable! I feel that it is this pain we feel that makes us human. Pasts can be painful, but they are painful because they were associated with something that at one time brought immense joy and the absence of that joy or the reference to that joy in past tense is now unfathomably painful.

But no one enjoys being in pain. And fretting and agonizing over it, never leads anyone anywhere. But so full of ourselves are we, that we believe that we are invulnerable, omnipotent and we take a kind of morbid pleasure in masochistic tendencies. We feel it is rather 'cool' for lack of a better word, to subject ourselves to trauma while outwardly appearing strong and capable of 'handling it'. And my response to this is - drop the act, quit the mask. It hurts and we all know it. Smiling through the pain, laughing in the rain, is good for poems and songs. It's not wrong to hinge on to something else and try to heal and then move on. I allude to the band-aid. It comes in as a panacea on the wound, and helps you heal.

But for how long can you hold on to an external support to heal the pain within? Sooner or later the band-aid's got to come off! And here, pulling off the band-aid, hurts more than the wound itself. It is much less the actual pain, than it is the psychological apprehension that something could hurt. It is the fear of the unknown - once hurt, one gets used to the band-aid and is afraid now of a new way of life, after the pain and without the band-aid. If a certain thing of the past has been covered, with the object of letting it heal itself, it is better to let the band-aid come off on its own. Forcefully prying it off, trying to prove to the world that you are strong and can handle and face anything with courage and might, is probably counterproductive. Some shards of the old wound might still be rather green and these could end up hurting and perhaps even festering!

Yes, everybody hurts, and everybody is entitled to a bolster in order to heal. Arrogance and feigning superiority, never helped anyone. But so what if something hurt? That is life, and this pain is what primes you for better joys ahead. So, step into the new year, knowing that every past is a promise for a bright new future that results in a resplendent new present. So like someone said - the past is gone, the future is unknown, all we have is the gift of the moment, which is why it is called - the present... Happy new year every one!

The Perfectionist

The Perfectionist. Someone who needs everything in the right place in the right way. Someone who will never rest until a job taken is well, PERFECT. I am sure almost all of us would have had a chance of meeting someone that suits that description. Some like such people, but a majority detest them. Reason, perfectionists can be exacting, very demanding just in order to achieve that perfect result. Some even use the terms 'perfectionist' and 'control freak' interchangeably. The perfectionist wants the perfect color in a painting, the perfect font in a presentation, the perfect report, the perfect everything. As long as THEY put in all the effort to achieve that, it's fine. But the minute they expect everyone else, who is really not interested in achieving that level of perfection, to go the extra 1000 miles, they get the epithet of being a control freak. And when that transformation happens, it is not a very nice place to be in!

But then I thought about this from the perspective of the perfectionist! I really wouldn't hold them to be really bad and mean. They are just driven by that deep desire to be the best. Which is not really wrong. And trust me, it is not easy being perfectionist. They end up shouldering responsibility for portions of a project that perhaps is wayyyyyy beyond their control. They end up pushing themselves over the limit to achieve that end. Now, the harmless variety of perfectionists who do not make life hell for everyone around is someone to be looked up to. Aamir Khan holds that title in the Indian film industry. And his is actually a case in point. Almost all of his movies are raging successes. And the effort he puts into each work of art is palpable in the end result. Be it the emotion, the narrative or even performing that intense workout for a role that is supposed to catch your attention for 3 hrs! It is tough.

Take for instance a perfectionist in a project. He/She not only works his/her part, but also goes through the whole to ensure the end result is up to expectations. Not only is this is a huge time commitment, that involves probable juggling of other key tasks and activities, but is also a huge center of stress, if the interim outcome is not satisfactory. They then push themselves to tie up the loose ends and bring the work up to mark. Imagine their plight, if for the failure of someone else, the whole work ends up bringing in sub-optimal results. They'd end up feeling cheated. But the chronic perfectionists never give up. They are psychologically bound to pushing for perfection. They somehow can never slack off. They feel inadequate if they are not perennially glossing over some aspect of the work at hand. And given that more often than not, they end up achieving their desired results, they don't mind the extra mile of effort. In fact, they are wary about losing the desired result, in case they don't put in that kind of effort.

So, is being a perfectionist a good thing? Well, I really don't know. But my guess is, as long as you don't kill someone else's happiness, while achieving super normal success, it is fine. What say?

Amazing snippet that I wish we could all follow...

A friend of mine just sent me this piece, supposedly written by Chetan Bhagat of 5 point someone fame. Now that book puts campus life in perspective and for the first time, shows the other non-glamorous side of IIT. And this piece is something I truly loved and I wish I could follow what he says here. So, Godspeed!

"Don’t just have career or academic goals. Set goals to give you a balanced, successful life. I use the word balanced before successful. Balanced means ensuring your health, relationships, mental peace are all in good order.
There is no point of getting a promotion on the day of your breakup. There is no fun in driving a car if your back hurts. Shopping is not enjoyable if your mind is full of tensions.

"Life is one of those races in nursery school where you have to run with a marble in a spoon kept in your mouth. If the marble falls, there is no point coming first. Same is with life where health and relationships are the marble. Your striving is only worth it if there is harmony in your life. Else, you may achieve the success, but this spark, this feeling of being excited and alive, will start to die. ……………….

One thing about nurturing the spark - don't take life seriously. Life is not meant to be taken seriously, as we are really temporary here. We are like a pre-paid card with limited validity. If we are lucky, we may last another 50 years. And 50 years is just 2,500 weekends. Do we really need to get so worked up? …………….

It's OK, bunk a few classes, scoring low in couple of papers, goof up a few interviews, take leave from work, fall in love, little fights with your spouse. We are people, not programmed devices........."

"Don't be serious, be sincere."!!

It is not just important what you have; it is more important what you do with what you have."

Thinking too much

I do that all the time. That's why my blog's called 'Thought Center'. I read between the lines. In fact I read only between the lines, allowing my wild and vivid imagination to think up things that perhaps are so convoluted that only a martian could conjure up such tactics! Nevertheless, what I've noticed with people is that this 'overthink' results in a certain idea or viewpoint. And this viewpoint then becomes a religion. A religion that has to be protected at all costs. Guarded and upheld with one's life. The viewpoint then becomes so deeply ingrained that one could perhaps go out with their swords and off with the opponent's head! The viewpoint becomes one with the viewpoint holder and an opposition to the viewpoint then becomes a direct affront to the individual. And this can be harsh!

I remember one of my favorite profs once mentioning - 'In marketing people would tell you to go where no one has ever gone before. But stop to think whether no one has gone there before because there is a strong enough reason to not go there ever!' Yet another one of my fave profs said, "stop thinking beyond what is necessary. If there is a question, it is a plain question, set with the intention of exacting a straight answer. Contrary to what you may think, I get no pleasure by playing trick or treat with you guys!" So overthinking clearly is treading where no one has ever gone before and no one has gone there before because the place (in this case scenario I am imagining) is just a figment of my imagination! And imagining improbable what-if scenarios is akin to trick-or-treating! Besides, the strong adherence to a viewpoint, also reinforces a form of confirmation trap. I have an idea that I believe in. You present a contrary viewpoint, but I reject it since I am looking to prove my point. Any disconfirming evidence is actually not paid attention to! I just want to pick and choose information that buttresses my viewpoint!

So moral of the story - it does not pay to think too much. No matter how much one tries to second guess another human being or try to comprehend what is happening inside that person's black box called brain, the margin of error in the prediction is still going to be 50%. Since at the end of the day, unpredictability thy name is mankind! So don't ever waste time thinking and overthinking something. Some things are best tackled by rules of thumb and Bayesian probability!!!